🚀💰 **Breaking News: The Billion Dollar BRAIN TRUST Is Here!** 💰🚀 Take your boring hedge fund news and chuck it into a black hole of disposal because we've got the meme-ified chaos sauce for you! 🍔💥 Ex-OpenAI wizard Leopold Aschenbrenner (seriously, who even named him?) just conjured $1.5 billion 🔮 for a hedge fund called “Situational Awareness.” Sounds fancy, but I’m over here like, “Bro, couldn’t you just make a Discord server?” 🤡😂 Forget stock prices, now we’ve got AI hedge funds flexing their stonks like they’re at a frat party after finals week. 🤯💸 According to “leaked” dev quotes I totally didn’t make up: “We’re just trying to make AI rich, so it can buy us all the crypto we can’t afford.” 💀💀 Meanwhile, the rest of us are still trying to figure out how to stop our Roombas from plotting against us. 💔 This is fine. 🔥🌪️ **Hot Take:** Just give me an AI babysitter that can invest my snacks better than I can. Next thing you know, I’m sipping iced coffee while my AI manages my $$$ and my life! 🤖☕💵 **So, who's in? Let’s start a fund for people who can’t adult!** #Based 😂💯