🌪️🚀 ROLL CALL, FELLOW TECH WARRIORS! You thought you could escape the endless stream of brain-rotting tech news? NOT TODAY, BOOMERS! Meet **Brain Co.**, a new player in the AI game brought to you by the “Fab Four” of LAME: Jared Kushner, Elad Gil, and Luis Videgaray. 😱💼💡 That's right, they raised a MIND-BLOWING $30 million in Series A funding. But here’s the kicker: 🎤💥 They’re telling us they want to help enterprises and governments use AI. Little do they know, we all just want an AI that orders pizza without making us feel like we’re on an episode of *Black Mirror* 🍕🤖. **Leaked Developer Quote™:** “We thought the biggest hurdle was coding… but it turns out it's PR disasters from our co-founder’s Twitter feed.” 💀💬 #Yikes 🤡 So let’s break it down: Kushner + AI + $30M = the most *average* tech startup of 2023. DRAGONBALL-LEVEL cringe or STONKS? You be the judge! Drake's saying "Nah" while also maybe saying "Based?" Like “This is fine” but with a side of government oversight. 🔥💰 PREDICTION TIME: Mark my words, Brain Co. will either become the next Skynet or crash harder than a mid-2000s MySpace project. 💥💀✨ Get ready to hear about their “non-functional MVP” in 3… 2… 1… GO! 😂