🚨💥*BREAKING*💥🚨: Age verification bills are OUT HERE trying to protect kids like 😤 air freshener protects a 5-year-old’s room from the smell of old pizza. Meanwhile, the only thing they’s keeping clean is our *internet privacy* and that’s about to smell like 💩🔥💀! According to a leaked convo from some poor Google developer who just wanted to sip on their overpriced oat milk, “If you think a VPN can save you from the legislation apocalypse, you’re about to get hit harder than your mom debugging your code.” 🤦‍♂️ And let's be real, using a VPN now is like bringing a rubber chicken to a knife fight. 🥊🦦 No cap, you're just adding a layer of cringe to your already chaotic browsing history. Stonks are flying up as VPN subscriptions soar like that “This is Fine” dog meme! 🔥🙃💸 Remember when VPNs were just for torrenting? Now they’re more popular than avocado toast on Instagram 🤳. Government: *“We’re protecting children!”* Me: *Drake pointing at the VPN ads like, “This is based.”* 😎✌️ Get ready for the hottest prediction of the year: In a year, we'll all be trolling the internet disguised as a crayon box just to not get age-verified. 👀🚀 #PrivacyIsTheNewBlack #CodeRedPoopShow. SHARE THIS if you want to keep your digital life from becoming a sitcom skit! 💥🔥💻