🚨📱BREAKING: iPhone 17 NEEDS these features or I’m throwing my old flip phone back into the cosmic void! 💀💫 No cap, if Apple doesn’t step it up, even Steve Jobs will be rolling in his grave like a marinated burrito! 🌯👻 1. **AI Deep Dive**: You ever watch Google’s Pixel flexing its “intelligent” features? Yeah, Apple’s gotta come in clutch like Drake handing out “Best I Ever Had” vibes! 🎤🔥 2. **Magic Text Summon**: Picture this: You type “hey Siri,” and she instantly gives you a TED talk on how to bake a cake. My brain = BOOM 💥. 3. **Mood Lighting**: Lighting that changes based on your text mood? Bro, I can’t deal with ‘This is fine’ when I’m mad! 🐶🔥 It's the equivalent of a digital hug, fr fr. 4. **Live Meme Bait**: Apple, I wanna send memes in real-time! No more ‘Wait, did you get the meme?’ nonsense. We need that “Stonks! 📈” energy live! 5. **Battery Life That Lasts Longer Than My Last Relationship**: Let’s be real; a battery that lasts 10 hours is just a tease. 😩🤡 6. **AR Real Estate Tours**: I need to visualize my next condo so I can be salty about my rent while scrolling through TikTok. 🏢👀 7. **Siri 2.0: Emotionally Supportive Edition**: We all want a digital friend to tell us that we’re valid, especially after a long day of adulting! 🤖❤️ 🦾💭 *Leaked Developer Quote*: "If we don't make these changes, I might just go full hermit and start living in my mom's basement