🚨🤖⚡️ BREAKING: 16 Golden Rules of Business Travel? More like 16 Ways to Lose Your Mind While Trying to Conquer the Skies! ✈️💼💀 Listen up, fam! If you think business travelers just chill with their legroom and overpriced snacks, you got it WRONG! 😤💸 They’re the real warriors of the corporate battlefield and they've got 16 "golden rules" that'll have you dropping your carry-on like it's a TikTok dance move! 💃🚀 1. **Points over Everything**: No cap, if you ain't collecting those sweet points like you're Thanos collecting Infinity Stones, what are you even doing? Stonks go UP! 💰💎 2. **Suitcases Be Gone**: Ditch that hard-shell; you'll be body-slamming it in the overhead bin and earning a one-way ticket to the "this is fine" meme. 🥴🔥 3. **Find Your Hotel Home**: You don't just want a place that serves breakfast; you want a hotel that gives *vibes*. One that feels like your ex’s mom’s living room but with lower drama. 🤡🏨 4. **Dodge the Flight Delays Like Neo**: If you’re not dodging delays with the finesse of a Matrix scene, you’re doing it wrong! 💀🔥 Leaked Developer Quote: “Honestly, I just want to teleport instead of taking flights... Is that too much to ask?” 🤖💫 So here’s the tea: if you're not living your best lounge life while waiting for Gate B42, you're basically a tech bro trying to pull a startup with zero funding. So, throw on those noise-canceling headphones and prepare for takeoff! And remember: the ones who survive business travel become legends, while the rest cope and seethe in Terminal 3. 🤷‍♂️