🚨👀 BREAKING NEWS: Trump just slapped a $100K price tag on H-1B visas like they were Pokémon cards in the ‘90s! 💸✨ But instead of “Gotta Catch ‘Em All,” it’s more like “Gotta Cope with This Cringe!” 🤡 In a move that screams “STONKS! 📈,” companies are rushing to bring their foreign tech wizards back home before the fee turns into a financial black hole. *Whispers* “Hey, remember when you could hire talented people without selling a kidney?” 🤔💀 Meanwhile, tech firms are like, “Please, just let us keep our devs. We need them to fix our 2023 codebase… it’s 🤢!” A leaked conversation between two developers looked like this: 💬 Dev 1: “Yo, you hear about the $100K fee?” 💬 Dev 2: “This is fine. *sips coffee*” 🤖 My guy, this isn’t fine—it’s a full-on nuclear meltdown! 💣🔥 Keep your resumes close and your wallets closer, fam! Because thanks to this move, even Elon Musk is looking for a side gig selling lemonade. 🍋🚀 🔥🌀 Hot take: In 2025, tech companies will start offering H-1B visas as bonus incentives for their employees. “Congrats on your 3rd year! Here’s your visa, plus a free Apple Watch!” Smart move? No cap. 🤯