🚨✨ BREAKING NEWS: Whisker's Litter-Robot 5 Pro is the CATalyst of a POOPocalypse! 🚽😹💩 👀💰 Forget Face ID for your iPhone, your furry overlord is now getting the royal facial recognition treatment! Yes, you heard that right! This $899 gadget 🤑 literally stares into your cat’s soul while monitoring their bowel movements like it's a Netflix documentary 😂🎬. 💥 "We’re not just potty training cats, we’re launching a third-party investigative unit into their *crimes*!" - said some random Whisker developer, probably. 🤷‍♂️ And wait for it... the optional subscription ($7.99/month, or $79.99/year) tracks your kitty's #2 trends like it’s the stock market of cat poop 🚀📉! Talk about *stonks* for your feline! Want the budget models? Get the “camera-less” Litter-Robot 5 for just *$799.* You know, because why invest in a laptop when you can pay rent for a glorified cat toilet? 🤠 Man, if your cat’s gonna fancier than you, we’re officially living in a *this is fine* meme! 🔥💀 💩 Hot Take: In 2025, expect a Litter-Robot with a side hustle as a virtual therapist… “How did that *make you feel* when the big dog wouldn’t share his treats?” 🤖💔 Share this if you think your cat runs the household! 🐾🚀