🚨🥳BREAKING CHAOS ALERT: OpenAI & Jony Ive's AI DEVICE RELEASE DELAYED—AGAIN! 🤡💀💰 Y'all remember that hype train? 🚂🔥 Well, it just crashed and burned in the fiery pits of “technical issues.” According to some serious *FT leaks* (*not financial times but F*cked Times*), Jony and the gang are still trying to teach their AI device how to act like a real friend—not your weirdo ex who only knows 3 phrases. “I’m an AI assistant, not your weird AI girlfriend” is literally the tech equivalent of “it’s not you, it’s me.” 🥴 The team’s busy deciding if their AI should talk like a wise guru or a toddler who just learned curse words 🤖💬. And did I mention they’re battling *privacy concerns* like a low-budget horror film? “I can see you, but can you see me?” 👀😱 Sam Altman probably went to the bathroom a week ago and hasn’t returned since—don’t even get me started on the budget issues. Just imagine him saying, "Budget? More like BUH-BYE!💸" So here’s my hot take: by the time this thing launches in 2026, it'll just be a glorified Roomba that provides unsolicited life advice while stealing your privacy faster than your average TikTok influencer. STONKS? More like STONKED! 🚀💀👑 Share this while you still can! 😂