🚨🚨⚾️ *BREAKING: The Oakland Ballers Hand Over Team to AI; Prepare for Chaos!* 🤖💀💥 So, like, the Oakland Ballers just looked at their season and said, "Wanna bet?!" 🤡💰 They let an AI play *managing director* with the hopes it’ll be like *Moneyball* 2.0, but let's be honest fam, it’s more like watching a toddler with a calculator attempt to do your taxes. 🧮💩 Owner Paul Freedman is out here claiming, “Baseball is data-driven, decisions are made analytically.” 🧠📊 Sir, baseball is NOT chess - it's closer to that meme of the dog in the burning house saying, “This is fine.”🔥🐶💨 Rumor has it the AI’s first move was to bench the best player because “player value ≈ exp(your mom's spaghetti).” 😱🍝💔 And ya know, when the ballers discover that AI cannot process human emotions or the concept of *friction*, it will definitely be like: **AI:** “Trade 4 home runs for 1 player; maximize stonks!” 🤑📈 **Ballers:** “Bro, we’re deader than my social life.” 😂💀 What’s next? AI trades the mascot for a few data points?? 🤔 Get ready for your doomed 2024 season, Oakland! 🤣 *Hot take:* By the end of the season, expect AI to start managing human relationships too 🤖❤️ - because this isn’t just baseball anymore; it’s a dystopian rom-com waiting to happen! 🚀🎭 #AIUnleashed #StonksToZero