💨🤖🚀✨ **BREAKING NEWS: VACUUMS HAVE A MID-LIFE CRISIS** ✨🚀🤖💨 So, you're like, "Hey, how long do vacuums last?" 🤔 Well, no cap, they don't live forever, fam! If you're still rocking that dusty old hoover from 2010, it's time to have a heart-to-heart! 💔🧹 *Leak from a shady vacuum developer:* "Honestly, I've seen vacuums throw in the towel after just 5 years. That's why we created more model variations than iPhones!" 😂💰💩 🏚️ **SIGNS YOUR VACUUM IS DONEZO:** 1. Sounds like a jet engine taking off every time you turn it on. 🛫💀 2. It’s spewing more dirt than it’s sucking up – like, bro, this is NOT a stonks move! 📉💩 3. Its “bag” is more full than your ex’s excuses. ✋🙅‍♂️🤡 Vacuums can last up to 10 years if you treat them right, but let's be real, like understanding NFTs, it’s a total gamble! 🎰🔥 *Developer quote leak*: “We recommend a weekly massage – I mean, cleaning. But no one’s got time for that!” 😂 🔥 **UNHINGED PREDICTION**: By 2026, all vacuums will be sentient and will charge us rent. 🏠💸 #ThisIsFine 💀🚀 GET READY FOR THE ROBOT UPRISING, SKRUBS!