🚨BREAKING: Uncle Sam is playing both sides! 🚨💀💸 You heard it here first, folks! The government just hit us with that *five-alarm cringe* as it turns out they’ve been trading high-tech surveillance goodies WITH CHINA since the days of flip phones and Myspace! 🤯📱💔 💼🤖 *Leaked developer quote*: “Yeah, we just thought it was a casual collab, like putting ranch on pizza. Turns out, it was actually a full-on corporate espionage buffet!” 🍕🥴 Five administrations, and the only thing bipartisan is complete and utter betrayal! 😂 This is the ultimate case of “this is fine” while sipping coffee in a flaming room.🔥☕️ But wait—hold onto your TikTok accounts! The GOP and Dems have proven one thing: when it comes to enabling big tech, they’re like Drake in “God’s Plan” – *pointing at the money and ignoring the morals*. 🤤💰 So, here's my hot take: in 2030, we’ll all be outfitted with government-approved “supervision goggles” 👓 that come with a side of targeted ad capitalism! 💥💥🔥 Stonks?! Nah, STONK-LER! 🤡🚀 Who's ready to get surveilled for free?! Let the meme chaos ensue! 💪😂 #TechDrama #ChinaIsWatching👀