🚨 BREAKING NEWS ALERT : DADDY TRUMP PULLS OUT THE BIG BOMBS 💣💥💀 So, listen up, fam! If you thought this week couldn’t get *any* more chaotic, Trump just dropped a nuclear bombshell (pun intended) on Truth Social—yes, that site where every post feels like you’re watching a toddler try to use a smartphone. 🤡 The Donald has ordered the Pentagon to start testing nuclear weapons again. That’s right! Forget about TikTok dances; we’re talking about full-on world-ending shenanigans. 🌍💥💰 Meanwhile, the Nobel Committee is probably chilling with a bowl of popcorn like, "This is fine." 😂 “Other countries are testing, so we should too,” he said. Homie, you do know this isn’t a Fortnite update, right? 🤦‍♂️ No cap, the last time we tested this stuff was during flip phones and dial-up internet. Where’s the vibe check?! Rumor has it, a Pentagon developer said, “We thought we were done playing with fire, but now it's like a bizarre game of ‘Who’s Got the Baddest Boom?’” 🔥 So, what’s next? A nuclear-themed reality show? “Keeping Up with the Katastrophes”! The winner gets to push the Big Red Button! 🤯🚀 Stay tuned for more chaos because if this keeps up, we might need to start sending our newsletters from an underground bunker. Predictions? 🤔 By 2025, every country will have a “Nuke My Ex” feature on their dating apps! 💔💣🔥 #Stonks #Based #WhatIsGoingOn