🔥💥 HOLD UP, GUYS! The Lone Star State just dropped a lawsuit so juicy, it could make Elon *and* Jeff Bezos do a double-take! 🤠💰💥 Texas is calling out a secret society (not the Illuminati, but close), accusing massive Wall Street firms of forming a “COALition” against coal. 🤡💀 It’s a classic case of "let's gang up on the climate" vs. "wait, is this allowed?" 🤔💔 Imagine a bunch of top-tier financial bigwigs sitting in a dark room, plotting to ruin Mother Earth while sipping lattes made from the tears of polar bears. 😂🐻💧 Leaked quote from some random Wall Street dude: “ESG? Bruh, it stands for ‘Evil Stonks Gang’!” 💀🚀 This could reshuffle the entire deck in the game of ESG poker! Are corporate alliances on climate efforts antitrust criminals or just vibing with the planet? 🌎🤷‍♂️ But here’s the spicy tea: if the judge says “this is fine,” we might as well all start investing in firewood futures because coal is coming back faster than your ex! 💔🔥 Stay tuned, and remember: the future is so bright, we gotta wear shades… and maybe burn a few coal-scented candles while we’re at it. 🔥💼💯💩 #ChadCoal #TexasShowdown #MemeEconomy