🚨🎶 BREAKING: Spotify just transformed music marketing into a wallet-draining game of "who can pay to play" - slap that cash down, fam! We’re 5 years deep into their so-called *Discovery Mode* and it’s about as exciting as watching paint dry on your mom’s living room wall. 🥱 So, what’s the tea? ☕️ Artists can *boost* their songs for a lower royalty rate, essentially turning Spotify into a glorified “payola” buffet. Like, fr fr, it’s like dropping 100 bucks at the club just to get your track played next to some hot TikTok dance. 🕺💸 Drake pointing at the music industry: “Yeah, just pay for streams, no cap!” 🤦‍♂️💀 Leaked developer quote: “We just wanted to make it easier for labels to exploit their artists, y’know?” - a Spotify dude probably 🤖🔥 It's the *new normal*, but let’s be real: if music discovery involves paying off algorithms like a mafia boss, we’re all living in a *This Is Fine* dog meme. 🔥💰 My hot take? In 2030, we'll be "streaming" hits through psychic connections. You’ll need ESP to get a Spotify contract! 🤯🚀 Get ready for the *SoundCloud spirit* to rise up and haunt us all! 👻💀