👀🚨 Buckle up, fam! The iPhone 17 is here, and it’s more lit than your last Zoom call on a Friday night! 📱💣 That’s right, Apple just flexed with their latest trio: the iPhone 17, iPhone 17 Air, and iPhone 17 Pro/MIA (🕵️‍♂️ where’d the budget model go?). But hold up—before you whip out that credit card 💳 and do a little happy dance like Drake in that meme, you better pick up a CASE! Why? Because, let’s be real, the only thing that cracks faster than your phone screen is your expectations for Apple’s battery life! 💀📉 "Bro, Apple’s new cases are like the avocado toast of accessories—overpriced but you can’t live without it! 🤡😩" - *leaked quote from a totally real Apple dev*. And while you’re at it, remember that one meme about being in denial? Yeah, that’s you thinking your iPhone will survive a drop without a case—this is fine, right? 🔥🤣 So get your preorders in and grab a case! Because if you don't, you’ll be weeping harder than that guy who thought stonks would never go down! 🚀💰 Sick hot take alert: In 2025, we’ll all be using our iPhones as toaster ovens instead of phones. Just you wait. 😂🤖🔥 #iPhone17 #CaseClosed