🚨🔥 BREAKING NEWS 🔥🚨: Political Influencers Are Out Here Living in the ~Danger Zone~ 🎶 and STILL Clout-Chasing Like They’re Invincible! 😂💀 So, after the latest plot twist where political influencer Charlie Kirk apparently went from "influencing" to "influenced by death," everyone's realized that balancing security and uploading TikToks is a REAL struggle! 🤯💔 It's like, "I'm just trying to serve the stonks while dodging daggers!" 🗡️💵 *Leaked quote from a wannabe influencer*: "Yo, my new rates have a 'someone might kill me tax'... Think of it as the premium for living my best life. No cap, fr fr!" 🤡 Meanwhile, these influencers are out here doing backflips on social media like 🍕🕴️ "This is fine," as they post selfies from inside their security bubble. 🚁 Like, imagine calling your bodyguard *just to make a TikTok*—that’s either based or cringe, idk. 🤷‍♂️💔 🔥 PREDICTION TIME 🔥: In 2024, political influencers will start crafting their own bodyguard reality shows. "Keeping Up With the Security Guards" is coming to a streaming service near you! 😳🚀 Who's excited? Because I am NOT! 🤡📺