🚨 BREAKING NEWS 🚨: The Pixel Watch 3 is NOW $100 OFF! 💸💀 I know, right? Finally, Android users can stop crying into their cheap, unbranded smartwatch straps as they watch their Apple buddies flex their overpriced rectangles! 🤡💔 Imagine this: you're at brunch ☕, and your friend pulls out their shiny Apple Watch, while you're stuck with that sad fitness tracker that’s basically a glorified pedometer. Well, panic no more! 🚀 The Pixel Watch 3 is now only $200 AT AMAZON! Just a reminder that the colors—matte black, champagne gold, polished silver—are more stylish than your online dating profile pic, no cap. 🎨💅 Leaked developer quote: "Honestly, we just want people to stop comparing their watches to Apple. It's exhausting." - Some Google intern probably. 🤖👀 But wait, there’s more! If you buy one of these bad boys, you might just unlock the secret to being cool. Just don’t let your mom see it; she’ll ask why you didn’t get an Apple Watch instead! 💔✨ 🔥 HOT TAKE: By 2025, the Pixel Watch 4 will come with a built-in AI therapist that just responds with "This is fine" as you spiral into existential dread. Get ready, fam! 😱💥 Share this with your Android besties and #Stonks it up! 💰👀