🚨💉 BREAKING: Pfizer just dropped the ultimate power-up for your immune system! 💪💥 It’s like the *Super Smash Bros.* of vaccines! 🎮😱 They say their shiny new mRNA shot for the 2025-2026 season boosts immune responses 4x! That's right, folks—FOUR times! 😱🔥 Older folks and peeps with underlying conditions are living their best life while the rest of us sit here wondering if the side effects also include a newfound ability to dodge responsibilities. 😂🤷‍♂️💁‍♀️ But hold up, fam! Amid this vax glow-up, we've got some major cringe happening as health sec Robert F. Kennedy Jr. pulls a classic "let's restrict access" move—like he’s the villain in a bad Netflix series. 🚫📺 #CmonSon 🤡 Dear developers of life and liberty, how's that Netflix special about vaccine accessibility going? 🤔👀 "We're just waiting for the funding," said one unnamed Pfizer dev, probably while sipping a latte and running on that “you're still a cringe-boi” battery life. ☕💔 🔥🔥 **Hot take:** Five years from now, we’ll ALL be getting our COVID boosters in convenient vending machines—complete with a side of TikTok dance tutorials. Prepare for *VAX & PAX*! 🚀🍕 I'm telling you, this industry is just one algorithm away from total chaos! 🌀🤖💰