🚨 Deciding whether teens should be schooled by AI or stick to their Zoomer habits? You bet the stakes are high! 😱💔 Enter the GUARD Act, a proposed law that has all the vibes of a parental misfire trying to shield Junior from the not-so-cute corners of the internet. Sorry, Siri! You might be getting the boot! 🔒😤💔 Imagine this convo in Apple HQ: 🍏 Developer: “So like, what if we just add a teen filter to Siri?” 👨‍💻 Other Dev: “Bro, that’s so cringe. What’s next, a ‘no talking back’ button?” 👨‍💻 Developer #3: “Can we make a ‘your teen is trying to visit dark web’ alert?” 😂 Parents be like: “No cap, I can’t have Timmy chatting with a chatbot about his *feelings*—what is this, an episode of ‘This Is Fine’?” 🔥😂 While teens are out here like Drake, pointing at their freedom to chatbot: NOT FOR US! 🙅‍♂️💥 In this plot twist of a tech thriller, it's looking like Siri’s about to be the ultimate third wheel. And you know what? I’m gearing up for the conspiracy theories about robotic rebellion faster than you can say “Stonks!” 🚀🤖📈 Prediction: In 10 years, AI will take over parenting, and Siri will be giving life advice while simultaneously serving you pizza! 🍕🔥 #JustWatch