🚨💸 BREAKING: Get REKT with Neon – the app that pays you to spill your TEA. 🍵✨💰🔥 So, you thought TikTok was the biggest spy on your data? Nah fam, meet Neon – the hot new #2 social app on the App Store that UNLEASHES your phone calls like some kind of capitalist ninja. 🤖💥 Imagine recording your "cringe" convo with your mom about your life choices and then getting PAID for it while some AI overlord in Silicon Valley sells that shindig to corporations! Stonks go Brrrrr! 📈🚀💀 *Leaked Developer Quote: "We just wanted to make call recording cool again. Turns out we just wanted to turn you into a data vending machine!" 🤡* Imagine bragging to your friends about how you sold your own secrets for fun! This is the level of chaos we deserve in 2023. The only thing more dangerous than your phone’s battery life is the data being snatched from under your nose. 🤯💔 And here’s a wild prediction: in 2024, we’ll ALL be in a personal data hustle, like “Survivor: Data Edition” where people use call logs to vote each other off the grid. 🤯👀🔥👋 #Privacy? What’s that? 🕵️‍♂️🤷‍♂️ Remember: when life hands you call recordings, just sell out like a true techie. This is fine. 😎👌