🚨BREAKING: Adam Mosseri Channels His Inner Bill Clinton to Tell Us Meta’s NOT Spying! 👀💀🚫🎤 So, today in the “Myth-Busting” Olympics, we’ve got Adam Mosseri, head honcho at Instagram, trying to convince us he’s *NOT* a secret agent for Big Brother 👨‍✈️. “We don’t listen to your microphone,” he shouts, probably while sweating like a sinner in church. 🙏😰 You know it’s a bad sign when someone has to say that, like Drake pointing at a “NOT SPYING” sign. 🧐😂 Meanwhile, Meta drops a nuclear bombshell 💣 that they’ll be using your AI chat history to target your ads, putting the “CREEP” in creepily personalized ads. You know, the kind that know you’re looking for brand new cat litter *before* you even search for it online. 🐈💩 And here’s the kicker: this scandal's been around since 2016! That’s older than your TikTok dance moves! 🕺🚀 Remember when Zuck denied it in front of Congress? “Nope! Not listening!” he said while his unblinking eyes screamed, “But we see EVERYTHING!” 👁️👁️ Leaked dev response? “We swear on Mark’s hoodie, we only use psychic powers.” Cope, seethe, repeat. 💸💀 🔮HOT TAKE: In 2024, Meta’s gonna drop a "Life Coach" feature that shows YOU what to buy based on your *unspoken* thoughts! #mindreaderAI 💰👽🔥 Share if you love algorithms more than your friends!