🚨💸 *BREAKING NEWS* 💸🚨 — Hold onto your life vests, folks! The British tech tycoon *Mike Lynch*, aka the *Billionaire from the UK* who probably names his boats after fancy math concepts, just had his $40 MILLION yacht, the Bayesian, serve up a Titanic-level tragedy 🍷💔. Yup, you heard that right! In a classic case of “This is FINE”, our boy's luxurious floating fortress got struck by lightning 🤯⚡ — the universe clearly said, "No stonks today, my dude!" 22-year-old deckhand 🤡 Matthew Griffiths was a certified cringe lord of yacht life 📸🌊 — “I was just trying to get a TikTok vid for my followers,” he said, while the boat was sinking beneath him! 🚤💀 And honestly, who needs a yacht when you can have a Galaxy Brain 🧠 moment and invest in, like, literally anything else? *Mike Lynch* is probably already seething in his bank vault because even his *wealth strategies* can’t float this mishap! 💯😂🔮 So here’s the wild prediction: in 5 years, Lynch will just buy himself a *vibe boat* — or just build a super yacht made out of solid gold that’s unsinkable 💰🚀. Cope, seethe, and meme responsibly, fam! 💥💯