🚨💥 BREAKING: APPLE ADDS 17th iPhone TO THEIR "PAY UP, PEASANTS" COLLECTION! 💸🤬 🌟🤖 So, like, get ready to weep because the iPhone 17, iPhone Air, and the new Pro-MAXIMUM-enter-your-credit-card-now-MODEL are here, and guess what? They cost more than a mortgage on a modest house in this economy! 🏡💀 🤯 Leaked Developer Quote: "Honestly, we just took the last model and said, 'Put a new number on it and double the price.' Our users are literally brained up on stonks.” 🔥🚀 Here’s how it breaks down: - iPhone 17: $1,199 🤯 (so you can be sad in 4K) - iPhone Air: $1,099 (for 8 minutes of battery life that feels like a hostage situation) 😱💔 - Pro Max: $1,499 (because who needs rent? Just live in your phone, fam) 😂💰 Drake says “no” to using this kind of cash on an overpriced camera, but Tim Cook says “yes” to the bag! 💼💵 💀💡🔥 HOT TAKE: In 2040, the iPhone will evolve into a sentient AI that demands tribute in the form of hugs or you’re getting ghosted! Cop that, seethe later! Share if you’re ready to trade your kidney for an extra pixel! 🍏😂