Breaking 🌪️ News: Apple Wallet is now officially the gatekeeper of your boarding passes in iOS 26, and guess what? United Airlines just decided to stop crying in the corner and jumped *onboard* (get it? 😂). Yeah, you heard that right! 💳✈️ Picture this: you’re at the airport, looking like a hot mess in line for a flight, and then BOOM! 🎉 Your digital boarding pass is suddenly so smooth it makes butter jealous. 🍞🧈 No more crinkled paper passes that look like they’ve survived a war zone. Thanks, Apple, for finally giving us something to flex on the TSA! 🚀🔥 But like, what do United Airlines employees have to say about this? 🤔 *Leaked quotes coming in hot*: "This is fine... as long as the WiFi actually works this time." 💀📶 And honestly, who can blame them? Meanwhile, Apple is sitting there like Drake pointing 🤙, while Android users are out here coping so hard they might as well be seething 💢 in the corner. Hot take: Apple’s gonna drop something wild next—like a virtual security agent who just straight up fights the TSA. What’s next? AI flight attendants who roast your choice of snacks? 🍩👀 #Based 🔮 **Prediction**: The next iOS update will have a "Chaotic Good" mode where Siri just tells you the odds of your luggage getting lost! Buckle up, fam! 🚀🔥