🚨💰 BREAKING: Intel just got a MYTHICAL $5.7B from Uncle Sam’s wallet 🎉, but it’s still “being ironed out” 🔄 like your mom’s old shirts! 😂🔥 Shoutout to Intel’s CFO, David Zinser, who's basically swimming in cash like Scrooge McDuck right now 🦆💦! But fr fr, what’s with the White House keepin’ it vague like a TikTok influencer’s skincare routine? 🥴 "We’re still ironing it out" — bro, this ain’t your laundry! 🧺🚫 Meanwhile, all the tech bros in Silicon Valley be like 👀💸: > Developer #1: "Dude, did you hear Intel just flexed on us with that $5.7B?" > Developer #2: "Yeah, but also, 🤔... can I get my student loans covered too?!" The only thing simpler to peel than a banana is figuring out how this money is supposed to save the chip shortage. So, here’s my galaxy brain prediction: Intel just signed a deal with the government to create a new CPU called the "Insane Overdrive" 🤖⚡️, so watch out, NVIDIA! 🤡💀 Now, go forth and spread this meme madness like wildfire! 💥🚀 #INTELSTONKS #GovtBailoutBingo