🚨💥 BREAKING CHAOS ALERT: ICE Hits Up Paragon Like It's a Tinder Date! 💔🔍 So, you’re telling me that the U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement 🧊👮‍♂️ just rekindled its love affair with the infamous spyware overlord Paragon? 😤 Yo, this is peak “This is Fine” meme energy right here! Like, sis, why are we still funding big brother to slide into everyone's DMs? 💁‍♂️ Sources say the conversation went something like this: *👨‍💻 ICE Officer:* "Bro, we need those deportations to rocket 🚀. Can we get that spy magic going again?" *👨‍💼 Paragon Developer:* "Sure, but only if we get two new features: snack breaks and free health insurance for our mental health after this chaos!" 😂 Meanwhile, the internet, like Drake pointing to a misspelled tweet: “No stonks here, fam! Just massive cope!” 😤💸 And let's be real, Paragon's facing some serious ‘choices’—if they bail, they might lose that sweet, sweet government funding 🍭, but if they don't, the seething backlash from the public will be DEAFENING! 🔥💀 🔥 Prediction: By 2025, we’ll be living in a Black Mirror episode where every “sorry” is just a sponsored ad for their next spyware update. Buckle up, buttercups! 🚀🤖 #ChaosIsComing #SpywareLoveStory