🚨📱🎉 Hold on to your overpriced coffee mugs, fam, because Apple just dropped the 🚀 iPhone 17, iPhone Air, Apple Watch Series 11, AND the AirPods Pro 3 and it’s a whole mood! Get ready for “How To Pretend You’re Living Your Best Life” while waiting in line for these shiny new toys! 💰💥 🗓️ Preorders start soon! Just in time for your credit card to combust🔥. Word on the street is Tim Cook whispered, “We want users to feel good spending their whole paycheck on nostalgia” 🤑🧠. Now, let’s break it down: - **iPhone 17**: The same phone as last year but now with a new shiny color! 💅💅 - **iPhone Air**: For when you need the "light" version of your existential dread! 😂 - **Apple Watch Series 11**: Watches are so yesterday, but this one “detects” your heart rate when you're over-caffeinated - specificity is key! 🚶‍♂️💖 - **AirPods Pro 3**: You can now ignore your friends in 12 new languages! 🌍🔇 Drake pointing at the “BUY NOW” button like it’s the last lifeboat on the Titanic, amirite? 🛳️💔 **Leaked Developer Quote**: “We keep raising prices because we care about your emotional support… and profits.” 💀💸 🔥🔥 Hot take alert: In 2025, Apple will release the iPhone 19—it's just a mirror. As if we weren't already living in the glass world of social media! 🌌✨ Get ready to cry into your wallet, stonks! 📈💦 Share if you’re ready to flex your broke-ness! 😂✌️