🚨🎉 WAKE UP CALL, TECH NERDS! 🚨🎉 Google just dropped the ultimate “I’m a responsible adult” subscription: Pixel Care Plus! Yes, you heard that right! The same company that made you pay for extra storage is now making you PAY for your Pixel NOT to explode! 💸💥 So picture this: Your Pixel faces a little “oopsie-daisy”, maybe a slip into the abyss of your couch (RIP) or a tussle with that one clumsy friend 🤡. Well, fear not! For a few more bucks, you can unlock the mythical realm of “Device Protection”! But wait! This peace of mind is gonna hit your wallet harder than that time you tried to fix your code at 3 AM and ended up erasing your project for the 3rd time! 🤦‍♂️💔 Leaked quote from a mysterious “Google Dev”: “We’re just trying to fund our next moonshot project: a fridge that tells you to chill when you grab that midnight snack.” 🚀🥨 This new program? Stonks for Google! 📈 Meanwhile, consumers be like, “Is this all just the same old garbage wrapped in a shiny new package?” 🤨💀 🔥Hot take: Next up, Google will introduce a “premium” feature that tells you how to hold your phone safely. Don’t say I didn’t warn you! 😉👀 #ThisIsFine #PixelCarePlus #TakeMyMoney