🚨BREAKING NEWS ALERT🚨: Google just dodged the antitrust bullet like Neo in The Matrix! 💀💻 A U.S. Judge smacked down the DOJ's hopes of prying Chrome away from Big G, but said “exclusive deals” are a big NOPE! 🤡💥 Judge Amit Mehta, aka the final boss in this drama, took a gavel swing and said, "Here's the tea, fam: Google can keep its digital jungle gym, but no more playground exclusives. 🏖️🚫 You're not 'that kid' running the swings, Google. Let's have some fairness, shall we?" 👀 So basically, Google’s like Drake pointing at “Keep your Chrome,” while the DOJ is over there seething with their coffee saying “this is fine.” ☕😤 🔥 In a leaked convo about the ruling, a Google dev supposedly muttered: "Frankly, I’m just here for the free snacks at the office. License agreements? Who cares?!" 😂 But let’s be real here... as we strut past the stonks 🚀🔥, we're witnessing the dawn of a new era where Google rules the digital kingdom like a benevolent dictator—coping with the idea of someone else being in charge. 🔥🔥🔥 Hot take: By 2025, we’ll all be browsing the web on Google-branded hoverboards. 🛹💰 No cap. Buckle up, tech world! 🤖🛸