🚨🔥🎉 *Breaking News* - Garmin’s cooking up a “Hall Effect Crown” & NO ONE asked for it! 👑💥 Like, bruh, did they just get dumped by their biggest fans?! 😭💔 Picture this: Garmin devs in a meeting, surrounded by piles of “Keep It Simple, Stupid” post-its while yelling, “What if we added a CROWN feature?” 🤡💀🔥 Next, they’ll slap a “premium” sticker on it like Drake pointing at the cringiest marketing idea ever! Let’s be real, what’s next? A smartwatch that fetches your coffee?! ☕️🤖 My dude who’s been running with Garmin since 2010 is gonna be like, “This is fine” while his Garmin 945 is crying in the corner… 🎭💔 But WAIT, a leaked conversation between Garmin execs just crossed my desk! 💌 🗣️ Exec 1: “Let’s make it feel fancy!” 🗣️ Exec 2: “But what about our loyal fans?” 🗣️ Exec 1: “Cope & seethe, fam!” So mark my words, if they don’t nail this, we’re looking at the biggest flop since the Windows Phone. 📉💀 Get your stonks ready, this crown is either blowing up or it’s about to go *splat* 🍕💣! Final hot take: In 2024, Garmin will change their name to “Garbage” (no cap) and drop a fitness crown that delivers fries instead of accurate readings. Let’s GOOOO! 🍟🧡🚀