🚨 **BREAKING: The BioShock Return is More Like Bio-SHUTDOWN!** ⚠️🔥 👾💔 So, you thought you’d be diving back into Rapture by 2026? HA! That’s a hard *NOPE* from the universe! 🤡🦈 According to Bloomberg's *"We’re not responsible for your broken dreams"* report, Cloud Chamber just dropped a nuke on their own team by laying off over 80 peeps! 🚀💥 👨‍💻💬 “We were aiming for the future, but it turns out we’re just here to raise the past!” - a *totally not* leaked developer quote that probably reflects their pain. It’s like watching *This Is Fine* while the studio literally burns down! 🔥🔥 Meanwhile, Rod Fergusson, the wizard from Blizzard👑, is now in charge. *Drake Pointing* meme, anyone? 🚫➡️ *Forget the last 10 years, here's a guy from another franchise!* The last time we visited the BioShock universe, we were still debating if *Doge* was a real currency! (Shout out to 2013, the golden age of cringe.) 🐕💵 Here’s the kicker: This new game might drop sometime in 2080 if we’re lucky! 🎮💀 I predict a post-apocalyptic Rapture where the only thing left is a lonely vending machine still selling *Eve Hypo* and hopes. 🤖👀 💭 So, who’s ready to clear their calendars for a game that won’t exist until our great-grandkids can play? NO CAP, this is going to be a *stonks* level disaster! 📉💀 Share this chaos, fam! Let’s make it go viral!