📣🚨 *BREAKING NEWS!* ESR drops iPhone 17 cases that are so protective, they'd keep a T-Rex safe from a meteor strike! 🌍💥 After Apple’s “Awe Dropping” event (more like “Aw, It’s Another Phone” 😴💤), ESR is ready to suit up your shiny new tech like it's headed into battle with a Minecraft Ender Dragon! 🐉⚔️ These accessories are out here trying to turn your undamaged iPhone into an iPhone that looks like it survived a nuclear apocalypse—💀💥💰 STONKS! Pricing? They call it “affordable,” but it’s still gonna feel like you just gave your wallet a minor heart attack. 💳❤️‍🩹 Leaked Developer Quote™: “My mom always said, ‘If you can’t take the heat, wrap it in plastic.’” — ESR Engineer, probably named Chad 🤵💪 But wait, there’s more! They've covered AirPods, too! No more losing those $200 ear frisbees! 🎧✨ Just shove 'em in these cases and they might actually survive your existential dread... or at least your next workout. 🚀 HOT TAKE ALERT: In 2024, we'll all be wearing iPhone 18-sized wristbands completely decked out in ESR’s “Premium Protection”. Imagine the flex! 🤡💅 So, don’t be basic; protect your tech from itself! This is fine. 🔥🤷‍♂️