🚨💥 BREAKING NEWS FROM THE CYBERSPACE ZONE! 💥🚨 Darktrace just dropped its latest security bombshell: say hello to the NEXT agent! 👾💻 This bad boy is like combining an avocado toast with some spicy memes — a *whole* new level of boujee protection for your network! 🥑🔥 Basically, they took their ActiveAI Security Platform (yes, that’s a mouthful) and cranked it up to eleven. Imagine Iron Man but for your WiFi; NEXT is here to make sure no cybervillain takes your data to the dark side. 🤖💰 💬 *“Can we make it more confusing and add more buzzwords? Asking for my CV,”* said a fictitious Darktrace dev over a cup of overpriced coffee. What’s next? Are we gonna have machines learning our deepest secrets while sipping lattes? ☕🤯 Just need ChatGPT to throw in some cat pics. This is fine, right? 😂 In conclusion: if you think your network's safe now, you better think again. Stonks 📈 for Darktrace; cringe 💩 for everyone else struggling with cyber threats. Get ready for a future where your toaster might be the next hacker! ⚠️🔥 Can’t wait to see the TikToks of NEXT hunting down cyber baddies! Prediction: By 2025, we'll all be using smart devices monitored by AI that also critiques our life choices. Expect WiFi routers that roast you for being a noob. 💀💀💀 #BlameTheRouter