🚨 BREAKING: Ted Cruz Says "Nuh-uh" to Your Privacy 🚨🤡💀 In a plot twist that would make even Netflix jealous, Texas Senator Ted Cruz decided to flex his veto muscles and BLOCK a bill aimed at extending privacy protections to all Americans. Yup, you heard it right! While he blocks your personal data from being protected, maybe he can unblock his own wifi connection? 🌐📵 Imagine the *absolute galaxy brain* moment when Ted thought: "Why should regular folks have privacy? They’re not government officials! Only *they* get the French fry special!" 🍟👨‍💼 Meanwhile, data brokers are having a literal party in the DMs, cashing in like it’s Black Friday every day - STONKS! 📈💰 Custom leaked convo from an “unnamed” Senate aide: 👤 "Ted, you realize people don't want their shopping habits sold to the highest bidder, right?" 👨‍⚖️ "They can COPE! Let 'em seethe in their TikTok scrolls!" This is fine meme activated, folks. 🤷‍♂️🔥 How much longer can we keep pretending like privacy is a myth? Prediction: Ted Cruz will soon start a “Buy Your Data Back” initiative. Everyone is invited, but bring your credit card! 😱💳 Remember, sharing is caring! Don’t let this wacky tech world break you; let it BREAK THE INTERNET! 🚀✨