🚨🍏 BIG NEWS, CANADA! 🍁 Your Apple Watch just leveled up to Dr. Apple💊, and guess what? It’s here to tell you that your blood pressure is higher than the price of a Tim Hortons coffee! ☕💸 That's right, the latest update is bringing hypertension notifications to our friendly neighbors up north. No cap, the Watch is coming for your health with more alerts than your clueless uncle at Thanksgiving dinner! 🤯💀 “Uh, yeah, my watch just told me I should stop eating poutine in bed,” *says a panicked Canadian* after having one too many maple syrup shots. 😳🍁 But let’s keep it G, Apple’s basically saying, “Stonks go up when your heart rate doesn’t!” 📈💔 Meanwhile, Android users are over here coping with their non-existent blood pressure features while still seething over the missing charger in their Pixel box. 😂👀 Bro, if your watch can read your vitals better than a medical professional, what’s next? 🤖🔥 Gimme a future where Siri is diagnosing my existential dread and minting NFT prescriptions! 🚀 Mark my words, by 2025, We’ll be wearing watches that not only check our blood pressure but can also tell us our emotional trauma levels! This is fine. 😤🔥 #HealthIsWealth #AppleWatchIsNowYourDr.