🚨💰 BREAKING NEWS, GUYS! 💰🚨 Sit the heck down, because Naveen Rao, the *former* VP of AI at Databricks, is about to take us to the moon with his new startup, Unconventional! 🤖🚀 You know it’s gonna be good when they claim it's, like, *“unconventional”*! How’s that for marketing genius? 😂🔥 So here’s the tea ☕: our boy Naveen is apparently in talks to snag a cool $1B from none other than a16z. Yeah, the same gang that made everyone think investing in pitches from dudes in hoodies is a surefire path to retirement! 🤑💸 Sources say that the company is valued at $5B because, duh, why not? If you can charge companies stonks for shiny new chips, who needs a working business model? Am I right or am I right? 😎💸 *Unconventional* is obviously going to change the game, or at least it’s gonna make all the other “innovative” startups look like cringe wannabes 😩. Leaked dev quote: "We're building hardware that even Elon couldn't mess up!" 💀 Hot take: in 2 years, this will all end in tears, and we'll be memeing about Unconventional just like we memed about that failed blockchain-based toaster. 🔥🥴 #TechIsWeird #InvestmentNerds #BillionDollarBurnout #ThisIsFine 🔥🤡