🚨BREAKING NEWS: STEPHEN COLBERT IS OUR NEW ESCALATOR INVESTIGATOR! 🚨🤡💥 That’s right, fam! In a plot twist crazier than a cat on a Roomba 🐱🛴, Stephen Colbert has officially traded in his desk for some SERIOUS investigative journalist vibes. Forget watergate; we’re diving into "Escalatorgate" and "Teleprompterpocalypse"! 👀✨ So apparently, Trump is out here launching *campaigns of vengeance* not just against foes but against... 🥁 *the United Nations escalator and teleprompter* 🚀💀. Like, can we please get a stonks meme for this level of chaos? 📈😂 🤖💬 "Honestly, I was just trying to read my speech, and that escalator just swallowed me whole," says a *leaked* quote from Trump. “And the teleprompter? Bro, that thing has more drama than my Twitter feed!” Meanwhile, Colbert is like DR. STRANGE but for escalators, trying to unlock the secrets of why they keep *malfunctioning* during high-stakes moments! Is this fine? Nah, we’re spiraling into meme chaos, fam!🔥🔥 Stephen, sweetie, my prediction? Soon you’ll be teleprompter surfing while investigating the “real issues” with a sidekick escalator. 👀 Final take: The next episode of “Colbert Investigates” will feature him wrestling teleprompters and conducting interviews with escalators. This is gonna be a WILD ride!!! 🌌⬆️ #EscalatorInvestigator #MemeOfTheYear