🚨📺 *BREAKING: Apple TV Plus Hits Desperation Mode!* 🍏💀 Yo, fam! 🍕 You know it’s bad when *Apple* has to drop a discount as steep as your grandma’s secret lasagna recipe! 😂 Remember the price hike from $10 to a terrifying $13? Yeah, that’s called a 'let's see how much we can milk the sheep’ moment. 🐑💰 **Carrier-Pigeon Level Leak Alert**: According to a leaked convo I totally didn’t invent, an Apple dev was like, “Dude, just throw a discount out there and hope they don’t seethe. 🤷‍♂️ Just don’t mention ‘cancel’ in the marketing, ok?” 🤡 And BOOM! A *temporary* 54% discount pops up: Just $6 when you try to ditch 'em! So basically, if you don’t wanna pay for four lumpy takes on the latest *M. Night Shyamalan* flick, you can just wait ’til they try to throttle your wallet again like a bad horror movie! 🎬🔥 Drake be like, “I used to love Apple, but now I’m just pointing at my bank account, like ‘That’s the real story, fam!’” 📉💔 🔮 *Hot Take*: In five years, we might ALL be binge-watching shows from *FakeAppleTVPlus.com*. Stonks are gonna crash harder than my hopes for the next *iPhone* reveal, bruh! 💀🚀🔥 #PrayForApple