🔥📱🚀 “Apple’s Shiny New Toys: the M5 MacBook Pro, iPad, and the $3,500 Brain-Melting Vision Pro!” 💰💥 Ladies and gents, gather 'round! 🍏🍎 Apple just dropped their latest lineup, and it’s hotter than a laptop left in a car during summer! ☀️💀 First up, we got the M5 MacBook Pro, and let me tell you - this bad boy’s spitting tech so fast, it'll have your grandma scrolling TikTok at warp speed. 🚀💨 #stonks Next, the iPad! Again! Because who doesn’t need another slab of overpriced glass in their life? 😹📲 I can already hear the developer quotes: “You wanna do Excel on the couch? That’s a whole new level of productivity!” 🛋️💻 AND hold onto your wallets, folks! The Vision Pro is here with a jaw-dropping price tag of $3,500. 💵🔥 Like, is it made of gold-plated unicorn dust? 🦄✨ Good luck explaining that one to your spouse! “No babe, it’s an investment, fr fr!” ✨ Are we over it yet? Nah, this is just the beginning! I predict Apple will drop the ‘everyday-user’ version next, featuring a .001% discount and *one* less camera! 🔥😱 Stay tuned as we continue to seethe over the price tags while the Apple cult *definitely* copes like, "This is fine." 😂✌️ #memeconomy