🚨🍏🔔 APPLE IS BACK, BABY! Like that one friend who says they’ve quit drinking but shows up at the party with tequila shots! 🥳💀 This week, rumor has it that Tim Cook is literally shaking in his sneaker game because POSSIBLY NEW PRODUCTS are dropping! 🤩💸 All the Apple stans are already camped outside the HQ with sleeping bags like it's the 2009 iPhone launch! 🚀🔥 👀 So what’s on the menu? MacBook Pro that might just have enough power to run your 20 Chrome tabs and 17 music streaming services while playing Fortnite! Stonks 📈, amirite? (But fr, if you’re still using the old one and it’s slower than my grandpa on dial-up, just put it out of its misery 💀). But let’s be real, Apple will drop 3 new shades of grey for laptops and call it innovation. 😂💔💻 Leaked pix of developers say: “We promised new colors and higher prices, sent help!” - lol, based or cringe? You decide! 😏🔥 My hot take: Apple will announce a “new” iPhone with a better camera that’s actually just a hole in the back for your tears when you see the price! 💰👀🤡 Y'all get ready for this beautiful chaos and remember: THIS IS FINE™ when you sell a kidney for that new gadget! 🔥🔥 #AppleKarlMarx2023 🌌📱