🚨EXCLUSIVE LEAKED DEV INTERVIEW🚨: "We combined everything into one app because we couldn’t decide which one to use at 3 AM while hyperventilating over deadlines." 💀🤡 Y’all ready for Canva’s latest power move? Say goodbye to the ancient relics of Affinity’s Designer, Photo, and Publisher—now they're all in one app like an overstuffed burrito filled with creativity and regret! 🌯💥 That’s right! They hit us with the “free forever” trap, making it seem like it’s holy water instead of just a digital dumpster fire! 💪🔥 But hold on, fam – you ever hear about that one time subscriptions were a thing? Yeah, that’s a myth now! “We’re basically giving you a yacht but making sure you still pay for fuel,” said one dev who’s definitely not crying in the corner. 🛥️💰 And why stop there? There’s a lovely “one size fits all” file type for those who were still trying to differentiate their JPEGs and PNGs (cringe). Also, bask in the glory of AI tools! 🧠✨ Because clearly, letting an algorithm ruin your designs is the future. 🙃 Get ready for spontaneous memes and stonks for this app. Honestly, it’s gonna be so popular that we'll be editing our grocery lists in it. Here’s your hot take: This will all lead to a dystopian future where all creativity is just AI-generated cat videos. Enjoy that mental image! 🚀🔮