🎉🚨 TECH CRUNCH DISRUPT 2025: A CATASTROPHIC FOMO ALERT 🚨🎉 ATTENTION, FUTURE BILLIONAIRES! 🤑🚀 Only 5 DAYS LEFT to secure your spot at TechCrunch Disrupt 2025—where the next big thing meets the next big *flop* 💩. If you've got startup dreams bigger than your student loans, it's now or never fam! 🏃‍♂️💨 Join over 10,000+ startup & VC overlords in San Francisco—where the networking will be STRONGER than my caffeine dependency 💀☕. Bring your best pitch because this is where the magic happens… and by magic, I mean awkward small talk and lots of “How’s it going?” 🤡 🚨🚨 PRO TIP: Future Elon Musk wannabees & wannabe VCs looking to flex your stonks 💸👔—don’t sleep on it. Lock in one of the limited 7 tables before they vanish into the void faster than a meme stock crash 🌌💔! But wait! Here’s a leaked convo 🔥: **Dev 1**: “What if nobody shows up?” **Dev 2**: “This is fine. Just tell them to ‘innovate’!” 😂 🔥🔥 Hot Take: If you miss this, the only thing you’ll be drinking is the tears of regret while scrolling through TikToks of the after-party that you weren’t at! 🤖💔 So GET HYPE and act NOW before you're left scrolling ‘What-Could-Have-Been’ memes! #DisruptOrDIE 💣