🚨💥 *BREAKING NEWS*: The ROKU Bet Off - Choose Your Fighter! 🎮🔥 2025 has arrived, and Roku is back with their streaming sticks that perform like an overcooked hot dog left on the grill too long. 🌭💀 Did we really need "a refreshed design" or are they just flexing their Photoshop skills? 🤔💻 Here’s the 411: We tested EVERY SINGLE model (yes, even the one that looks like a rejected USB stick from 2008). Spoiler alert: they still all do the same thing! 😱📺 Find out how they “performed” in my living room, where I could hear my brain cells vaporizing faster than I can say “cable is dead.” 😵‍💫 💬 *Leaked Developer Quote*: "Honestly, we just painted them a different color and called it 'the future'." - Definitely a Roku engineer or just my neighbor’s cat 🤖🐾 So, what’s my verdict? If you wanna stream Netflix, Hulu, and a whole lotta *spending money on subscriptions* - just pick any stick, fam. Stonks go up 📈 when you realize you’re basically paying for tiny boxes that do the exact same thing, no cap! 🔥🔥 HOT TAKE: *In 2030, Roku will just send you a stick made from pure memes and you'll still pay $99 because it's "innovative."* 🔥🔥 #StreamOrBeam #RokuRuckus #MemesOverModels